Any Way You Build It Page 7

  His little face clouded over. “We’ll still be friends, right, when you move back to your place?” Todd knew that feeling. That was exactly why he avoided women with kids, he’d been that kid, full of hope.

  “Sure. I’m going away for a few days, I do that quite a bit for work, but I’ll be back and I’ll be just over the road.”

  The kid let out a breath neither of them knew he was holding. “Okay.”

  “Oh yeah, and Kevin says he’ll talk to the Scout leader about you joining Oliver’s troop.” He leaned down and whispered in his ear, “I think they have a real camping trip planned.”

  That put a real smile on the kid’s face.

  Later that evening, the ramp was finished and so was the pizza. Everyone was heading off, and the women were inside settling the kids in. Todd found himself sitting in Sarah’s backyard with Dermot, admiring the renovated porch.

  “You guys did a great thing today,” Dermot said.

  “Hopefully, it makes life easier,” he said. He was leaning back in an Adirondack chair, a beer resting on its arm. Dermot was nursing a white wine spritzer.

  “She’s had a rough time, that one, and not so great at letting people help her. I’m surprised she allowed this.”

  “I didn’t exactly ask.”

  “Good for you. You seem like a good guy. Sarah and I usually go for the same type of guy . . .”

  “Sorry, dude . . .”

  “No, what I mean is we usually both choose guys who are bad for us.”

  “Well, Sarah and I are just friends, so I don’t know that I qualify as anyone’s type in this scenario.”

  “She likes you. I can tell.” Todd kind of liked his straight to it approach.

  “Yeah, well, nothing’s going to happen between us. I’m not a relationship guy.”

  “You could just have sex.” Todd nearly spat his beer clear across the yard. “Okay, that idea seems unappealing to you?”

  “My experience with women and sex, which may be limited, is casual sex is never that casual when you have to see each other day in day out. Weirdness ensues.”

  “Yeah. You’re right. I just had something I thought was casual blow up in my face. Pity, though, she must be long overdue and there’s a definite attraction between you.”

  It was a pity because there was a definite attraction, but Todd had rules and he was not breaking them for Sarah or anyone else.

  #

  Sarah missed Todd. It was Sunday lunchtime and she and Dermot were on the floor with the kids playing snakes and ladders. Everyone was happy, but Sarah still wished Todd was here. She knew he was gone. His truck wasn’t in the driveway, and she knew because she’d sat on the windowsill of her room early this morning and watched him drive away. Her eyes had trained on the taillights until they’d turned the corner and out of sight.

  He was a mystery. He’d packed up his tools and his laptop, high-fived the kids, and headed home after dinner last night. He’d left her with a sense of longing, a bunch of new friends, and a way to get Livi in and out of the house. What he’d done had been amazing. Her fridge was also stocked full of food for the first time in months. He hadn’t asked for anything in return and that was puzzling.

  It seemed to her that these days most people wanted something in return for their good deeds. Not Todd apparently. In fact, not any of the people who’d come to help. They had all come willingly to help a perfect stranger and they’d more than done so, it was remarkable.

  Maybe, she thought, I am just jaded. First, her parents had been killed at the drug clinic trying to help people, she was a war widow, and now Livi . . . It was no wonder she didn’t see the world through a prism of unicorns and rainbows.

  The game ended, and Dermot hoisted her up from the floor. The kids were planning to watch their favorite movie, so she hobbled into the kitchen to think about dinner. She opened the fridge and surveyed the contents.

  “This is a great house, Sarah.” Dermot sat himself down at the kitchen table. “It is decorated in vintage old lady, but the bones are good. You can do a lot with it.”

  “I know, but it feels weird to change it. I will, of course, and I should go through my aunt’s things, but I haven’t had time yet.”

  “No rush.”

  “No, that’s not a priority. What I really need is a job.”

  “Have you thought of telling your new friends? It seems like between them they’ll know what’s going.”

  “Yeah.” She pulled some hamburger out of the fridge. “I didn’t feel like bringing it up yesterday. I was already feeling pathetic enough.”

  “Needing a job in a new town does not make you pathetic. Most people who move to a new town need a job.”

  “Yeah, but most people don’t sprain their ankle and need instant renovations and . . . You know.” She cracked an egg into the meat mix.

  “You’re being silly.”

  “I know.” She sprinkled in some herbs and bread crumbs, added a squeeze of sauce, and prepared to roll some meatballs. “It’s just that in my mind I’m capable and kick-ass, and in reality, I’m kind of a tragic figure.”

  “You are not. You’ve just had a rough patch is all.”

  “I know, but when we were at college, this isn’t how I saw it playing out.”

  “Me either. I was sure I’d be in a Broadway production not playing Boston.”

  “Yeah, poor baby, so far from your dreams.” She laughed and shook her head.

  “You’re the one who married the soldier. I told you that was not a career-maker even back then. You didn’t just end up on this path, you chose it. Own it, work it, and make the most of it. The only tragic thing will be if you don’t. Those kids deserve for you to do that.”

  She blinked and looked at Dermot. He looked like a fun party guy, but the truth was he had heart and saw things for what they were.

  “You’re right. Absolutely right.”

  “Time to leave the pity party and get on the action train. That was the Sarah I knew in college. You weren’t amazing because you danced. You were amazing because you never let anything stand in your way.”

  He was right. When did she become such a victim? It was time to change that and fast. She rolled the last meatball out and tossed it on the tray.

  “You are one hundred percent right.”

  “Thanks. I usually am.” He grinned at her, standing to slide the tray of meatballs in the oven. “When will you ever learn? I have been telling you that for years, as you know.”

  “Sorry, slow learner.” She smiled at him. “Thanks for coming up.”

  “Wild horses, baby, wild horses.”

  “You know the last few days have really brought into focus how isolated I have become not just this year but in the lead-up. But seeing how this community works, it’s clear I have been doing myself and the kids a disservice.”

  Dermot stood up, went to the fridge, and grabbed some water.

  “Yeah, I grew up in a town like this, and you know even though I don’t exactly fit the mold of the boy next door, it was a great life.”

  “I can see that.” And she could. Her whole life had been spent in the inner city and largely not in its nicest parts, so this was all new to her.

  “I loved your parents, Sarah. They were amazing people. You know that, right?”

  She gave him a nod. They were. The work they did to help those struggling with drug and alcohol addiction and their families had been amazing. They had dedicated their lives to it, and you couldn’t help but admire their efforts.

  “But, they didn’t exactly provide you with a normal childhood. This is what it looks like, honey. Campouts, cookouts, swimming, Boy Scouts, waiting for the ice-cream truck to pass . . . You can give that to your kids.”

  “I know. I just feel like I don’t know the rules, and I don’t fit the mold either.”

  “Hello, if I can make small-town life accept me,” he used his hands to showcase his body encased in fluorescent tights and a midriff tank, “I think you will be
just fine.”

  She laughed. The truth was her family had always been edgy and kind of looked down on the sorts of people who spent their whole lives cocooned in the bosom of their community.

  She remembered her father saying many times that he couldn’t believe how her Aunt Esme could stand living in this small town. Yes, she was a tenured professor at a college a half hour’s drive away, which he respected, but small-town life he never got a handle on it. Of course, they’d grown up in New York, so everywhere seemed like a small town to her father.

  Sarah herself had loved the summers she spent here with her aunt, but it never occurred to her that they were more than a way to make some money and escape the city heat. Being a camp counselor had been good experience and good money, a working vacation in her junior and senior years of high school. She knew her aunt loved the town, but she also spent lots of breaks traveling to bigger cities and exotic destinations. Sarah had thought that meant her aunt was mildly dissatisfied with life here, but maybe she’d read that wrong. Her life here gave her a firm foundation from which to have other adventures.

  “I can’t see me being a PTA mom or a Brownie leader,” Sarah said. “I mean, didn’t you see their faces when you told them about the burlesque?”

  “I did. And none of them looked judgmental at all. The women looked fascinated, and the men looked like they’d never heard anything so delicious in all their lives. Todd nearly swallowed his tongue.”

  “He did not!” Did he?

  Dermot arched his brows into his well-known “oh really” expression. “Look, there’s small-mindedness everywhere, but I don’t think those people are like that.”

  “Give this a good chance, throw yourself into life here for your kids, but also for your sake. It wouldn’t be so bad to belong somewhere, would it?”

  She shook her head. It would actually rock to belong somewhere.

  Chapter 6

  Todd had enjoyed his time at Squam Lake. The first thing he’d done was dive straight off the dock into the lake to cool off. He couldn’t seem to quite shake thoughts of Sarah. When he slept, she was in his dreams. They were sexy dreams where he had his hands and mouth in places that he had not had the pleasure of putting them in real life, nor would he ever. When he worked, images of her and the kids and the last few days kept filtering through his consciousness.

  He had hoped that the cleansing waters of the lake would wash the thoughts away. Of course, that had been a fool’s errand. He kept thinking how Zach would love to fish off the dock, how Livi could get some water therapy in the lake, and how Sarah would look sexy lying there in a bikini. Yeah, it hadn’t worked out as he planned.

  He had caught up with his younger buddies and done some serious water-skiing and that did help burn off some of the excess energy that had built up.

  “You’re wired, dude,” Cam, one of the younger guys, had said at the end of the day. “Where’s mellow Todd gone?”

  Where indeed?

  When they’d hit a local bar later where Todd usually took great pleasure in picking up a tourist to hook up with, he couldn’t quite muster the energy. Sure, he flirted and there were some very pretty, very eager girls there, but his mind kept wandering to Sarah. He was leaning over a pretty brunette whispering in her ear at the bar, but she didn’t smell right. No strawberries.

  In the end, he went home alone from the bar, something he rarely did. Yeah, he was a disappointment to himself, letting some woman he could never have mess with his mojo was not his style.

  The truth was Todd had never found it hard to get women. He was a friendly guy and not bad looking. His brother had asked him once if he ever told the women he ran a successful Internet business and his answer was, “No need, brother.”

  Women looking for commitment-free relations didn’t really care what you did for a living. If you bought them dinner, were good company, and showed them a good time, that was enough.

  He didn’t tell anyone about his business success because he wanted people to like him for who he was.

  At first when Todd had invented the Jungle Jam game, he thought it was a fluke. It was just at the time social media was on the rise and online games where people started to play against their friends and outscore them were just beginning in that forum. His game just happened to have the advantage of being able to be played by people aged seven to seventy. Monkeys, fruit, and racing from poachers, who couldn’t enjoy that? He’d caught the wave at the right time. He could have stopped then, but he’d wanted to see if he could do it again. He had three more equally successful apps going Lizard Lounge, where people bought, fed, and dressed pet iguanas, Gemstone Search, where you went mining, and Mermaid’s Quest, the latest that was especially popular with kids.

  The truth was he had engineers helping him out in Silicon Valley, but he did a large chunk of the design work himself. His California office had five people mainlining energy drinks and Starbucks, but because he worked largely from his tree house, he still felt like a one-man operation. Sure, he was loaded, but apart from the lake house, nothing else much had changed for him.

  He wasn’t a different guy because of his good fortune and he didn’t want to be treated as one.

  Marissa had speculated his wealth had hardened his resolve to be single but he disputed that. The resolve was always there.

  He wasn’t stingy. He’d helped Mike buy the farmhouse, and he gave to people all over his town, always. Anonymously and to many charities. He’d even set up a scholarship at his alma mater. He looked for ways to use his money wisely and his time. He was just shy of thirty, and he had the freedom to do anything he wanted.

  He wasn’t an idiot, he knew he was an unbelievably lucky guy. Yes, he’d worked hard, but the world was full of people who worked hard and never got a break. His own father, a factory manager and electrician, had keeled over with a heart attack at forty leaving behind two young sons and a wife.

  Todd turned into his driveway. It was always nice to come home. And tonight was poker night, his favorite night. All his friends would come over. They’d shoot the breeze, have a few beers, and pass the same few hundred dollars around the table that they did last time. That was a good life to him.

  He stepped out of his truck and there was Zach. On his lawn, staring at him.

  “You’re back,” the kid said in triumph. He was wearing navy shorts and a striped T-shirt. He was holding a baseball bat and a mitt. “I need your help.” No small talk, no bullshit, just straight to the point.

  “Hi, Zach, good to see you, too.” He laughed. “What do you need?”

  “Oliver says there’s a summer baseball league. I want to play.”

  “And?” He leaned back against his truck and looked down at the kid.

  “And I’ve never played before. So, I need help.”

  “What makes you think I know anything about baseball?” It was of course a leading question. He knew the kid’s brain went, “You’re a man, you can play.” It wasn’t very complicated.

  “I just know. Will you help me?”

  “I will.” He held his hand up. “But not this minute.”

  His little face fell. It was almost comical if it hadn’t been heartbreaking. “Oh.”

  “I have to unpack, buddy, and I have some work to do. When are the tryouts?”

  “Friday.”

  Todd looked at his watch. It was noon on a Tuesday. He really had some work to do. “Come back at three o’clock.”

  “Three, that’s hours away.”

  “I know. Hang in there.”

  He saw Sarah come out on the porch, and he gave her a wave. She was back in cutoff shorts, and today she wore a pink sleeveless top with a black pussy cat on it. Her ankle was unbandaged, but he could see it was ginger by the way she moved.

  “Welcome back,” she called.

  “Thanks. How’s the ankle?”

  “Much better.”

  Zach had his back to her, and she mouthed sorry and pointed at him. “Zach’s been waiting for you.�
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  “So I see. We’ll practice later, right, buddy?”

  Zach gave him a nod, but it was clear he was disappointed. That was too bad. Todd had a conference call with the LA office in half an hour. He reached in the back and grabbed his duffel bag and threw it over his shoulder. “I’ll see you at three, Zach.”

  Half an hour later, Todd was on the conference call talking about the rollout dates for their latest app. He could see Zach over on his front steps. Apparently, he was sitting tight until three. Todd felt his heart strings tug. Then, Sarah came out, crouched low, and talked him inside. He remembered being that kid, dammit. This was why he kept his distance from single mothers.

  “You there, Todd?”

  “Yeah, I’m here.” If he was blowing the kid off for the conference call, he needed to give it all he had.

  Sarah was so pleased that Todd was back. It was stupid really. He was just a neighbor. Or maybe a friend, and she’d had Dermot here, but just knowing he was out there made her feel better. Also, he’d left on Saturday and driven away the next day before she’d had a chance to even thank him for everything he’d done.

  Having the ramp had given Livi freedom to get in and out of the house and at least a little independence for which she was very grateful. The child seemed to be going in and out the door and down the ramp nonstop, so it seemed she was pleased with it, too.

  What she hoped was that Zach’s insatiable need for male attention didn’t send Todd running back to his cabin on the lake.

  She’d dragged her overeager son back inside to make cupcakes to take to Todd to say thank you for his help, and well, because it was a nice way to fill some time. At exactly three o’clock, the boy ran outside, the screen door slamming behind him, and raced over to meet Todd who ambled down his own front steps right on time.

  She followed her son out with the plate of cakes.

  As she crossed the road, he gave her a slow, sexy smile that had her melting from the outside in. Just friends, just neighbors, she repeated to herself.